Burnt Orange Report

BORed: Mid-day update from The Woods, Master Card 911

By Matt Hardigree

What's the X factor in surviving a disaster? Panic. Too much of it, you become careless. Not enough of it, you become careless. Today's example comes from right at home. My mother thought she lost her wallet and FREAKED OUT! She thought about identity theft, them taking stuff out of her wallet and emptying her bank accounts. Her voter registration card was in there, too, so she worried about someone voting Republican in her place.

They went driving around town like chickens with their heads cut-off. Eventually, we were able to calm her down by calling the companies, cancelling the cards and reminding her that, at the most, we'd have to pay $50 for fraudulent charges. So, everything worked out and was cancelled and, up to that point, no one had used it.

Then, when calm, a light snapped in her head and she walked right to the wallet, jammed in the seat of another car. Thus, the power of taking a deep breath. BTW, if anyone wants to send gas to my girlfriend, she's somewhere between SEALY and COLUMBUS in an ugly blue-to-light-blue Stinkin Lincoln Navigator.