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2013 or 1950? Conservatives Rail Against Having Sex Outside of Marriage

by: Ben Sherman

Wed Jul 10, 2013 at 03:47 PM CDT

A full 95 percent of Americans have sex before getting married, and 93 percent have sex before the age of 30. 70 percent of sexually active Americans 21 and under have had a casual sexual encounter. In American culture, we've largely come to see that there's absolutely nothing wrong with people making that choice.

But this reality is clearly lost on (or disliked by) many conservatives. Blatantly misrepresenting my post, "Bro-Choice: How #HB2 Hurts Texas Men Who Like Women," many right-wingers have taken to attacking it on Twitter and various blogs. They are are up in arms about one of the ways Texas' anti-choice bill will affect not only women's lives, but men's as well. In the post, I explain that the bill hurts men by (a) endangering their significant other's life, (b) forcing a decision on couples when they decide together whether to carry a pregnancy to term, and (c) forcing thousands of men into fatherhood when they are not ready or desiring of it.

The fourth point I made is that it will also significantly affect both women and men's otherwise healthy sex life. This is undeniably true. Conservatives are enraged that it would be included as a reason to oppose the bill. As I note in the post, the Republican bill will incentivize dangerous back-alley abortions by taking away almost all access to safe abortion facilities in Texas. Women will rightfully worry about this danger among the others, as will men, and it will instill cruel fear into Texans' sex lives whether they are in a relationship or not.

Read more below the jump.

There is nothing wrong with sex, or mentioning sex when showing how this bill affects both women and men's lives.

Sex is important to both men and women (and yes, women happily engage in casual sex too). We deserve to know what this Big Brother bill will do to endanger women's lives, hamper free choice, force Texans into unplanned parenthood, and affect their sex lives. These are not all equally weighted because the first three clearly outweigh the last - but they are all true.

Republicans have wanted to get in the way of Americans' sex lives for a while. This year alone, they have pushed to defund the family planning services of Planned Parenthood, criminalize women getting abortions following a rape for "tampering with evidence," re-criminalize sodomy, and cut sex education funding. Last year, conservatives across the country joined Rush Limbaugh in calling a woman named Sandra Fluke a "slut" and a "prostitute" for fighting back against her employer's refusal to provide health care coverage for birth control, even for non-preventative purposes. Republicans across the country are using sex in a divisive, fearful way to gin up votes from both religious and non-religious voters.

This war on sex does nothing but shame women, put them in danger, and hurt families across the country.

Despite the paranoid fantasies of anti-choicers, no one wants abortions to take place. The smear that women use abortion as "birth control" is an attempt to distract from Republicans' efforts to curtail access to birth control or make it economically feasible for women to raise a child. If anti-choicers really cared about anything other than forcing their own judgments on other people, they'd push to expand access to birth control, ensure equal pay for women, expand Medicaid so that women and families have better health care, strengthen sex education, and fund family-planning facilities - all of which would reduce the need for abortions. They can join the Texas Senate Democrats' efforts to do exactly that.  

The point of my post was to encourage men to stand up for Texas women. "Most of us have female friends, mothers, sisters, roommates that we care about, and who we think know better what to do with their reproductive health than a bunch of legislators. Obviously we should stand up for them," I wrote. I wrote "Bro-Choice" - merely a catchy term to draw people to the post, by the way - to encourage men to stand up for Texas women. Many have responded very positively to this call (among many others) for additional support in the fight against SB 1. I will continue to work on the crucial effort against this terrible bill.

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You're missing the point (0.00 / 0)
Most people in their reproductive years are saddled with debt and generally broke. If they make rational choices about whether to have children, the answer will almost always be no. That's why we have to prevent sex education, contraception and abortion. If we don't cause people to have unwanted children, there will be hardly any children at all. Who will be working to make my children richer?    

20 weeks' of gestation and hospital privileges? (0.00 / 0)
And you call it anti-choice?

Children are often born viable at 20 weeks now, and limiting abortions to pre-viability times seems reasonable, doesn't it? Europe doesn't go past 13 weeks, why aren't you screaming about them?

And requiring a doctor on site to have local hospital admitting privileges, so that any medical problem can be dealt wih properly, also seems reasonable, no? Now if a woman has a bad reaction to anesthesia or has a massive bleed or a heart attack (because don't forget, actual surgery is taking place in there), an ambulance must be called and no information is available to the arriving hospital.

Other clinics are required to have admitting privs by the doctors, why not abortion clinics?

You're giving reckless sex a bad name.

Still don't get it (3.00 / 1)
Yep. That's right, I, a strong conservative Christian Republican am in a war against sex. I am obviously totally opposed to sex....

Heck no! I'm a happily married man who happens to really love sex! It's awesome! It's incredible! It's one of the best gifts that God gave man! If I knew it would have been like this, I probably would have been looking all the more aggressively earlier for a wife. (Although the downside is I would miss out my current blessing.)

Yeah. A lot of people are having sex early. So what? That says zip about the wrongfulness or rightfulness of the action. If anything, I would think we should listen to those who are older and have more experience in life rather than those who are younger and have less experience. I say that as one nearing 33.

It looks instead like you are not willing to pay the full price of a marital commitment in order to get a really good thing, which will end up with more damage. Sex is like nuclear energy. Use it right and it's a wonderful blessing. Use it wrongly and you get Chernobyl.

You say you don't want abortions to take place. Why not? Why wouldn't you? If all abortion is is removal of a mass of tissue of some sort from the body, what's the big deal? Unless, could it be, that somehow what is happening is a baby is being killed?

Along those lines, your account of back alley abortions is a myth. This has been known for a long time. You really should pay attention to what's going on in the world.

Why not instead do what so many of us have done? (And this is what I did. I was a virgin until I married two months before I turned 30). Wait for marriage and then use proper procedures to plan matters out. If you don't want a child then, there are proper steps you can take. If you do get one, the child will have the blessing of a mom and a dad united in marriage. Make no mistake, the child will have a mom and a dad regardless.

Your stance is actually a cheap one to sex. Sex is cheap for you. For me, it's expensive. I paid with a lifetime commitment, which again is no problem for me. Lovers want to be bound, not free. If you love the woman, commit to her. If not, then maybe you don't really love her like you think you do and if not, you shouldn't be getting sex out of her.

Also, if you have counseled any women to have an abortion based on their getting pregnant through them having sex with you, then reality is that like it or not, you're already a father. All you've done is just encouraged someone, sadly the mother, to kill your children.

[ Parent ]
Logical fallacies will never prove your point. (0.00 / 0)
Just because most Americans have sex before marriage does not mean that most Americans approve of premarital sex. Also, citing an article from Glamour magazine as proof that women are happy to engage in casual sex is hardly proof. Republicans have no desire to regulate your sex life. What they do desire is to regulate the atrocious consequences of dubious behavior that impacts all of us. That's right, Ben: When you wantonly spurt your ejaculate into nameless women, there are consequences. You just don't hang around long enough to witness them. Please don't think you've fooled any self-respecting woman into believing that you are in any way trying to protect her. Of course, you even state your real reason for supporting this bill which is to ensure that your shag partner isn't thinking of copping out and ruining your fun.

P.S. You should check out this site. It might help you. https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com/

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