January 29, 2004
Chris P. Carrot
By Karl-Thomas Musselman
I thought I was crazy when I was in Iowa before the Black and Brown Debate. I wrote about it in an entry of mine back then that I thought I saw a Crispy Carrot running for office and that the three supporters there were more than the Clark, Lieberman, Sharpton, Moseley Braun, and Bush campaigns combined.
Low and behold, today I stumble across an article today about Chris P. Carrot running in New Hampshire. It's a PETA project. There is a whole website for him. And the saddest part?
Vice President Colonel Corn.
Please. Make. It. Stop. Ow.
Posted by Karl-Thomas Musselman at January 29, 2004 12:56 AM
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Screw Dean, Go Carrot 04!!!
LOL It's a Carrot-Corn ticket!
That's awesome. So...if he drops out of the race, will he endorse Kucinich?
Actually, now that I think about it, a walking, talking carrot running with a "Vote Vegetarian" slogan is really creepy -- isn't that sort of like promoting cannibalism? Eww.
These people are fucking out of their minds. They have a plan to put an excise tax (10 cents a pound) on all meat, to pass a constitutional ammendment defining all mammals, birds and fish as humans, to dissolve and liquidate the assets of any company convicted 3 times of animal cruelty, outlaw the use of live animals in circuses and ban the use of fur for clothing. That's just the tip top of the crazy shit. These people are out there...
This post reminds me of an hysterical true story I heard the other day. (Caution: this post is not rated PG, definitly a R for language.)
A well-to-do "big hair" Texas woman walked into a Chicago Hotel wearing a fur coat. The PETA protestors on the sidewalk shouted at her, "Do you know how many animals had to die to make that coat?!?"
Without skipping a beat, she shot back, "You know how many animals I had to fuck to get this fur coat."
"outlaw the use of live animals in circuses....."
I am actually in favor of that. Animals in circuses are treated horribly. Also, it makes me SICK to know that these animals are trained to do things nature never intended--such a dogs on a tightrope and bears climbing on odd platforms, and other stupid shit like that, while leading shit lives simply to entertain obnoxious people! Anyone who goes to a circus, sees animals doing potentially dangerous things, and thinks that is entertaining is one sick puppy, I'll tell you what. There are some animal acts that are good, where the animals are not in danger, and they are treated well. However, most circuses are awful. There needs to be heavier regulation (enforced, not just some pencil-pusher writing policy on it) and if that fails, then I think outlawing is the answer. I know this seems extreme, but I have done research on the subject, and it turns my stomach to know what these poor animals go through. They have feelings and needs too. I know--I have 5 pets, plus another dog who is no longer with us, and I can tell you that they DO feel pain and misery!
Regarding companies who are convicted of animal cruelty...well, I say close 'em down. Simple as that. If someone is cruel enough to harm animals and selfish enough to do it in the name of a better deodorant or shampoo, they don't deserve to reap rewards. If caring about animal welfare means that I am crazy...well, send in the guys with the station wagon and the white coats!
BTW, the fur coat joke was funny. I do have a sense of humor. :)
