It's Friday! Time for your Burnt Orange Reporters to comment on all the news that fits in a blockquote.
First up this week, the New York Times created a series of charts to show how state populations have moved around over the last 100 years. Here's Texas, but click through for more:
- Indian businessman Pankaj Parakh celebrated his 45th birthday in style by parading around the streets of Mumbai in a shirt made of pure 18- to 22-karat gold. Parakh's gold shirt cost $211,000 to make, though that doesn't include the cost of the bodyguards he hired to keep his shirt safe when he leaves the house. The shirt, which weighs 10 pounds, was created to get into the Guiness Book of World Records–I'm guessing he's vying for the “Most restrained and tasteful use of money” spot.
- Congratulations to Maryam Mirzakhani, a young Iranian woman who just won the world's most prestigious math award!
- On Thursday night, Keith Olbermann took over as the Pretend 10th Commissioner of Baseball. He immediately instituted 28 rule changes including the elimination of the designated hitter, tougher rules for PED usage, the suspension of the pointless All Star Game, and reinstating Pete Rose who will now serve as deputy commissioner!
Keith then asked his Twitter followers to submit their own ideas to be aired Friday under the hashtag #OlbermannChanges. Proposals include: Atlanta and Cleveland must immediately change their names, mascots, and logos; Every child under 12 shall receive a pack of baseball cards upon entry; the organ must be played between every inning; Joe Buck is banned from calling games; and The Astros must return to the National League and separated from The Rangers*.
*Last proposal put forward by me.
- A Texas teen hid inside a Walmart for four days. Not sure if that's what they mean by “Save Money, Live Better.”
- And this week in feminists go to the movies: Guardians of the Galaxy hit almost all of the marks – except when it came to diversity (no, a talking raccoon does not count). And a Garden State rewatch falls flat when your main movie standards are no longer “Yes! More kissing!” Finally, can we please have a Marvel movie about a woman or a person of color before there's another movie starring a white dude named Chris?