While the Republican gubernatorial primary has certainly shed light on the issues that Texas Republicans don't care about (education, the environment, clean energy, health and human services) the five propositions on the GOP ballot make pretty clear what the party's priorities are these days. On the eve of the primary election, let's look at the issues that Republican voters are asked to consider at the polls. And for those of you unfamiliar with these measures, I've provided a handy translation for what these propositions are really about.
Ballot Proposition #1: Photo ID
The Texas Legislature should make it a priority to protect the integrity of our election process by enacting legislation that requires voters to provide valid photo identification in order to cast a ballot in any and all elections conducted in the State of Texas.
Translation: It is imperative for the future of the Republican Party of Texas that we prevent minorities, the elderly, the poor, the transient, the disabled, and anyone who might overwhelmingly tend to vote Democratic from passing their ballot. We'd flat-out push for a poll tax if we thought we could get away with it. Also, our commitment to non-functioning government requires us to grind the Legislature to a halt over this issue and prevent meaningful laws from being passed, laws that would otherwise improve the lives of everyday, working Texans.
Ballot Proposition #2: Controlling Government Growth
Every government body in Texas should be required to limit any annual increase in its budget and spending to the combined increase of population and inflation unless it first gets voter approval to exceed the allowed annual growth or in the case of an official emergency.
Translation: Our population is booming while our sales tax revenue is dropping, but we can't provide the needed increase in spending for education, health and human services, or public infrastructure. And it's not enough anymore to just demand across-the-board cuts to balance the budget--which is in itself only accomplished through a Washington bailout of Texas that Perry campaigned against before accepting. We'll just unilaterally rail against "the evils of spending" without talking about where that money actually goes. Easy enough!
Ballot Proposition #3: Cutting Federal Income Taxes
In addition to aggressively eliminating irresponsible federal spending, Congress should empower American citizens to stimulate the economy by Congress cutting federal income taxes for all federal taxpayers, rather than spending hundreds of billions of dollars on so-called "federal economic stimulus".
Translation: We hate taxes! We really hate taxes! Don't tell the voters the stimulus worked, created tens of thousands of jobs, and prevented a second Great Depression. It's bad enough that every major economist agrees that the stimulus worked, that the rate of job loss has been turned around, or that the liberal media elites have all of this proof that government spending reversed an American economic death-spiral. It's just really important to constantly inflame partisan tensions against taxes. Just as long as no one does anything rash...
Ballot Proposition #4: Public Acknowledgement of God
The use of the word "God", prayers, and the Ten Commandments should be allowed at public gatherings and public educational institutions, as well as be permitted on government buildings and property.
Translation: There is no better way to inflame Conservative voter fervor than to act like Christianity is in peril. While we've already got free speech at public gatherings and a moment of silence in schools, what we really need is to decorate all of our public infrastructure with Christian paraphernalia. Let's run roughshod over the separation of church and state with some really God-fearing interior decor! Forget the fact that we have all of these non-Judeo-Christians in Texas, we don't need to respect their religious symbols (or lack thereof) as well.
Ballot Proposition #5: Sonograms
The Texas Legislature should enact legislation requiring a sonogram to be performed and shown to each mother about to undergo a medically unnecessary, elective abortion.
Translation: If there's one thing we hate more than taxes, it's women's rights! How dare those harpies exert control over their own bodies? It's as if they realize we won't do a damn thing to provide education, health care, fulfilling jobs, or public infrastructure for the children we'd rather force these women to bear. We also really want the victims of rape and incest to come face-to-face (pun intended!) with the consequences of their abuse. We demand a Republican thumb in every cervix! And if that's not permissable, this sonogram bullshit will do. Next thing you know, these women will be wanting their own credit cards and the right to vote. When does the madness stop?!
All of these propositions should pass by wide, wide margins--I'd be surprised if they don't. And that says just as much about the state of the Texas Republican Party as any individual race on the ballot. |