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December 20, 2004

Drunk Republicans and Free Champagne

By Byron LaMasters

This is just a funny story from my personal life this past Saturday night. Read it if you want. There's just something about Republicans, especially drunk Republicans that just amuses the heck out of me...

A friend of mine from Waxahachie that I've known since high school was celebrating his 21st birthday on Saturday night. He invited seven friends or so to celebrate with him by joining him at his suite, taking a limo to dinner, going around town in the limo, then back to the suite. That's not something I'm going to turn down on a Saturday night, so I said sure.

Around 10 PM we get to the Maggiano's at Northpark Mall for dinner where we proceed to order a family style meal at about $22 / person. It's a little pricy, but reasonable for a nice restuarant. About halfway through the meal, the birthday boy (who was a little bit drunk, and had been telling everyone we walked by that it was his 21st birthday) came back to the table followed by a rather intoxicated middle-aged businessman who he had "met" in the bathroom. That sounded a little bit suspicious, but we decided to go with the flow, and see what the deal was.

Sure enough, this man pulled out his credit card and declared that everyone needs a good bottle of champagne on their 21st birthday, so he proceeded to hand our server his credit card and order a 1985 Dom Perignon for $150. Then he ordered a second one. And then a third one for our table of eight. In the end, he offered to pay for the entire bill of over $700.

Nice guy, huh? Well, that's not the end of the story. At one point he asked one of the females in our group to sit on his lap, to which he added, "Don't worry, I'm not a fudgepacker or anything". Amusingly, of the five guys at the table, four of us were gay, and the straight guy was a Democratic candidate for state representative this year in Waxahachie whose name rhymes with "snake". On Sunday, I managed to look this guy up on OpenSecrets.org only to learn that he gave over $5000 to Colorado Republicans in 2004.

Anyway, so this nice drunk Republican businessman from Colorado bought a $700 meal for a bunch of gays, gay Democrats and well, just those ordinary heterosexual Democrats. We were kind enough to call a cab for him to take him to wherever he was staying, but I think that we all got the last laugh.

Posted by Byron LaMasters at December 20, 2004 10:10 PM | TrackBack

Comments

This was the Google Ad under this post when i tuned in.

"Republicans Campaign Gear
Celebrate victory and America! Buttons, stickers, shirts and more."

Posted by: tony g at December 20, 2004 10:20 PM

Hehe. Well Tony, next time click on it, because when you click on a google ad, it charges whoever sponsors the ad.

Posted by: Byron_LaMasters at December 20, 2004 10:29 PM

Speaking of Google Ads, when did you add them to BOR and how much money are they making us? Are we succeeding in our new capitalist adventure?!?! :)

Posted by: Karl-T at December 20, 2004 11:41 PM

I added them about a week ago, and I haven't decided if I'll keep them. They were earning like 10-20 cents a day most of last week, but then they earned like $1 for two days in a row, so if they make that much it's worth it, but we'll see. My main goal in adding them was to make them as non-intrusive as posible, so I added them to the sidebar on the main page, and then at the bottom of the individual archived posts. Tell me if you have any suggestions though...

Posted by: Byron_LaMasters at December 21, 2004 12:08 AM

The only reason to keep Republicans around is for amusing stories. And the money to be made in lawsuits over sexual harrassment. But that's it, they certainly shouldn't be governing anything.

Posted by: Nate at December 21, 2004 05:32 AM

I have been saying it for years that Republicans throw better parties. We are a lot more fun! Especially when you add liquor. That being said, I think the only reason to keep Nate around is to observe the growing intolerance of ideas that permeates the Democratic party. He conveniently forgets the accomplishments of the GOP. Buy this guy a drink! He needs to loosen up!

Posted by: Adam at December 21, 2004 09:31 AM

And GOP chicks are better looking.

With some notable exceptions, who will remain nameless ;).

Posted by: Andrew D at December 21, 2004 04:43 PM
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