Our Fearless Leader, Rick Perry, Part 2
By Byron LaMasters
"when Tom DeLay told Perry, as he often does, "Jump." And Perry, as usual, asked, 'How high?'"
Here's what John Kelso says what Rick Perry's daily schedule during redistricting will be. From his column in the Austin American Statesman:
A lot of people may figure Perry won't have much to do during the special session that will start June 30 because lawmakers will be focusing on legislative redistricting, so that Republicans can grab more U.S. House seats, as well as dealing with the budget.
But it's not true that Perry won't have a busy schedule. We've managed to get a copy of the chores list DeLay has presented for Perry during the session. Here's part of it.
Perry, by the way, has to perform this stuff while dressed in a cute little butler's outfit.
7 a.m. — Practice bowing, scraping and genuflecting.
7:30 a.m. — Polish Tom DeLay's loafers, press his shirts and help him with his coat and tie.
7:36 a.m. — Walk Tom DeLay's dog.
7:38 a.m. — Walk Tom DeLay.
7:42 a.m. — Light Tom DeLay's cigar and fluff Tom DeLay's pillows.
7:44 a.m. — Fluff Tom DeLay's ego.
7:46 a.m. — Make coffee for Tom DeLay, and ask, "Would you like cream and sugar with that, Mr. DeLay? How about a muffin, Mr. DeLay? Is there anything at all I can get for you, Mr. DeLay? How about a couple of cartwheels or a handstand, while we're at it, Mr. DeLay?"
7:49 a.m. — Hand-wash, polish and wax Tom DeLay's car.
8:10 a.m. — Resume practicing bowing, scraping and genuflecting.
Posted by Byron LaMasters at June 20, 2003 10:53 AM